triangularsecrets — Mon, 21 Mar 2011 01:08:54 +0000

I’m not even sure how to write this, for a lot of reasons. One, obviously you don’t want to give your explanation, so I don’t know what that means. Two, saying goodbye seems…. idiotic really. I mean, it’s sort of implied, but nevertheless, I think I need to type this.

I can’t love you anymore. I will always love you, obviously. And I will always love the time we spent together and the parts of me that you affected. I will always love you. But as time goes on, I have to admit to myself that I don’t know you anymore. You have moved on and made choices that took you far away from my life, so I can’t love you anymore. And I’m terrified of letting go.

But not letting go has left an even emptier space in my life than the one that you used to occupy. The emptiness is growing and growing and growing. And if you read my other blog ever, which I’m doubtful that you do, you would know that I have battled some serious depression. Am battling, actually. I won’t be following your blog anymore. I have to move on to open a new space for someone else.

I don’t even know how to do that. I’ve never loved anyone before you. And I loved you deeply. I am crying in the laundromat right now. This is so sad to actually allow myself to say goodbye to you. I just hope you read this so you know how much you meant to me and how much I have missed you. I feel like there is so much more to say, but I don’t think it would explain anything any further than what you already know.

Goodbye. With all my love, Garlic Naan

Filed under: Love

triangularsecrets — Fri, 21 Jan 2011 04:17:56 +0000

I want to hear your explanation. But please be clear with the things you say so I don’t obsess on the meaning behind the words. And please be willing to answer any questions I might have about what you say. And use the whole truth.

I’m not mad at you.

Filed under: Love

triangularsecrets — Fri, 21 Jan 2011 03:22:14 +0000

I’m not sure if I want to open these wounds, but I think I should. I still think about you daily, but i’m finding ways to cope now. I want to hear your explanation. But please be clear with the things you say so I don’t obsess on the meaning behind the words. And please be willing to answer any questions I might have about what you say.
And use the whole truth.

I’m not mad at you.

Filed under: Love

triangularsecrets — Tue, 07 Sep 2010 01:18:46 +0000

I remember.

Filed under: Love

triangularsecrets — Sat, 28 Aug 2010 05:19:23 +0000

My grandma is dying. I don’t expect you to feel any sort of sadness from me because I have no idea how to feel. I haven’t dealt with death since I was really young. I don’t know why I’m telling you this. Maybe because you are still the person I have let the deepest inside of me and this is a very deep hurt. I love my grandmother. She has always been the one person who understood me and the way that I was different from most people. She never asked me to be the same as everyone and accepted me for the way I was and who I am. maybe that is what I will say. I am typing a stream of consciousness. I miss her already so much. I was supposed to leave in the morning, but we’re leaving now.

Filed under: Love

triangularsecrets — Fri, 20 Aug 2010 03:56:19 +0000

I still think about you every day. Multiple times a day actually. I love you. I know that I always will. I mean already knew that, but …. I can’t believe the most important person in my life isn’t in my life. It’s weird, and empty….

Filed under: Love